Answering An Ad

I was running through one evening last week, and there, amongst the spam, was a “hose wanted” ad. “F in local area needs M for bottom treatments – email“. I, and probably half the E-males on the Net, promptly answered. I also emailed my story collection.

When I “saw” her online, I struck up a conversation. We chatted about how she’d gotten interested, and her experiences. I suggested meeting in a safe/public place, and she accepted. We met a few days later for Italian food, at a small place she suggested on the south side of town. I was taken by her long blonde hair, classic face, and curvaceous but athletic body. Dinner was excellent, and we conversed in low tones.

It’s hard to talk discreetly about enemas and rectal temperatures during dinner in a public spot, so we chatted about mutual hobbies, with occasional oblique references to THE hobby. It turned out that she had a major fantasy about over-the-lap rectal temperatures. I suggested finding a park for a bit of car chat after dinner, but she wanted to get home. I walked her to her car, and produced a surprise. Handing her a thermometer, I suggested she try it. We shook hands, and parted.

By the following weekend, I was definitely ready to meet her. I’d gone most of the day without seeing her on-line, but then a message flashed on my screen. We chatted a bit, and she revealed that she was ready for a live encounter. I got and printed directions to her house, and set a new personal record for high- speed freeway driving.

I arrived at her house to find her in tights and a robe. She offered me a drink, and I asked for some water, then suggested we get to it. I had her remove the tights, leaving her in undies. She slid the robe back on, since she was feeling shy. I lubricated the rectal thermometer as she lay down on the bed. I turned back to the bed, and saw her bottom, ready for me except for a pair of black satin panties. I asked her to raise up, then slid them down, revealing a perfect, round bottom with no tan lines. With her bottom bare, I took up the thermometer.

Here was the moment she (and I) had been waiting for. With a twisting motion, I gently eased the glass rod into her tight pucker. I couldn’t see her face – she had it buried in the pillow, but I heard her gasp. I began slowly moving the instrument in and out, twirling it, and asked her what she liked best. She preferred a straight in-and-out motion, so I stuck to that. Then, I had a thought.

“Hang on, there, I have to grab something.” Leaving the thermometer quivering upright in her bottom, I turned back to the dresser. I’d unwrapped a laxative suppository, and I explained what it was as I lubed the tip. Then, with her up on her hands and knees, I removed the thermometer, lubed her anus and slowly slid the suppository into her. Her breath caught as the medicated bullet shape entered her, and I could feel her quivering as my finger penetrated. Then, I withdrew, and reinserted the thermometer. As I stroked with the thermometer, I asked if she could feel it.

“Yes, it’s a bit warm in there”, she said.

I told her that it’d start making its presence felt soon, and returned to my anal attentions. Letting a finger slide forward, I was amazed at the level of arousal I encountered.

“Been thinking about me while I was on my way?” I asked.

“MMMmmmm…” was about all I could get from her.

“Ready for something bigger?”


I replaced the rectal thermometer with the big candymaking thermometer. This really got her bottom squirming, especially after I inserted a vibrator in front. She was obviously enjoying herself, and I had her roll onto her left side so she could amuse herself with the vibrator as I handled the thermometer. The lady was obviously getting into it, so I decided to prepare for the next installment of our game.

Leaving her in charge of her twin invaders, I stepped over to the dresser, and filled her rectal bulb with heavy mineral oil. Turning back, I paused to enjoy the sight of her enjoying herself, and asked if she was ready for her first erotic enema from a man. She rolled over toward me, smiled, and agreed. I invited her across my lap, and she settled down and got comfortable. I anointed her anus with a couple of drops of oil, then rubbed it in. Then, I gently inserted the tip of her syringe into her anus, wiggling back and forth a bit as it entered. When it was in, I began to squeeze.

I felt her shiver as the cool oil filled her rectum. I asked, “Feel nice?”

“Mmm, yes…”

“This is going to take a while – it’s thick oil and a thin nozzle. Just relax.”

I kept squeezing the bulb for the minute or so that it took to empty, feeling her squirm on my lap. I moved the tip in and out a bit, to keep her from getting bored. As near as I could tell, she wasn’t. Finally, I had the bulb as close to flat as I could make it. Withdrawing, I set it aside.

Then, my “patient” found out why I’d worn an exam glove for this. I began inserting a finger in her bottom, wiggling it a bit to help her relax. She was extremely tight, but being full of oil, was also very well-lubricated. I began a slow massage of her bottom with my finger, sliding a couple more into her forward opening for good measure. She reached back and retrieved the vibrator, applying it to her clit. This kept up until the suppository, the enema, or both, decided they wanted out. Since her bathroom was on the other side of the house from her bedroom, I had prepared to prevent accidents. Removing my finger, I started to work in a butt plug. This was actually an effort – this lady had obviously NOT had many, if any, large objects up her bottom. By dint of gentle pressure, her relaxing, and several deep breaths, it entered to the narrow neck at the back.

I asked if if felt okay, and she said yes. I helped her up, and we walked to the bathroom. I had her bend over, pulled the plug, and left her to her private relief.

While my “patient” was taking care of that, I cleaned and relubricated the butt plug, and prepared her next treatment. I filled a douche bulb with warm water and a splash of Castile soap, and unwrapped a lubricant suppository. She got back to the bed, and I introduced the lady to knee-chest position – on her knees, bottom up, and head on the pillow. I made my usual three-ring production of inserting the suppository – I started by tickling her anus with the tip, then inserted a bit at a time, letting it come partway out. Finally, I held it with my fingertip right at her anus, letting it melt a moment before burying my finger. She sighed as I withdrew, then her breathing quickened as the thick rubber douche tip began invading her bottom. I took my time inserting it, savoring the moment, then turned the bulb bottom up and squeezed. This time, of course, the huge tip and thinner solution made for a much faster injection. She definitely felt it, and then this time, pushed back against the butt plug. Once that was in, I had her lie on her side, and resumed the vibrator treatment. To spice things up, I inserted another in her pussy while she tickled her clit with the first.

Between the enema and the butt plug, the shorter vibrator inside her was pressed forward, providing some interesting G spot type sensations. I think, though, that I might have been a bit over-enthusiastic about the soap – she had to take her leave of the bedroom a bit more quickly this time.

While she was in the bathroom dealing with the soapy water, I prepared her soothing rinse – filling my 2-quart red fountain bag with warm water, and two tablespoons of baking soda. I hung it on a coat-rack in her room, with the enema, douche, and dildo nozzles available for her to pick from. She came back in, and looked at the bulging bag with a bit of apprehension.

“Whoa. Are you SURE about this?”

“Yes, if we leave that soap inside you, it’ll irritate you something fierce. Now, choose your tip.”

She looked them over, and decided on the “medium” one - the douche tip. I attached it, bled out the air from the hose, and lubricated the end. I could tell she’d paid attention to the stories I’d sent her - I turned back to the bed, and she was lying in Sims position, on her left side with knees drawn up. I lubricated her anus, massaging in the KY, feeling it relax. Then, I put the tip of the douche nozzle to the opening, aimed it at her navel, and slowly pressed inward. Her bottom quivered at the penetration, and suddenly yielded to the nozzle. I slid it all the way in, and asked if she was ready for the water.

“Y-yesss… Go ahead.”

I popped the clamp. “Feel it?”

“Mmmm, yes. I’ve had a couple of colonics, but they weren’t this sensuous. Pass the vibrator, please….” As the bag emptied and she filled, I slowly raised it higher. I was amazed at the ease and speed with which she took the whole two quarts. As the bag sucked air, indicating it was empty, I reached for the plug. Keeping it handy, I told her how well she’d taken it. She said she was full, but not cramping – in fact, she was enjoying the sensation. I hung the bag out of the way, and again pushed in the plug. This time, she wasn’t going to go until she came. We played with the vibrators and fingers, then she rolled on her back for me. I massaged her breasts alternately with one hand, and played around down lower with the other. At one point, I got some interesting shivers and gasps from my “patient” by buzzing the back of the butt plug with the vibrator. Once on her back, though, it wasn’t long until she had a bed-shaking orgasm. She figured at that point that discretion was the better part of valor, and headed for the pot.

By the time she got back, I’d cleaned the enema bag and had it drying. I was unwrapping a couple more suppositories and putting the tip on the Prep H tube. I invited her over my lap for the evening’s final treatment. First came a healthy squirt of ointment, moving the nozzle in and out as I squeezed. Then, each of the two suppositories was inserted, taking my time for maximum enjoyment. Finally, I began her last rectal massage of the evening, with a couple of fingers inserted in front to make it more interesting. I let my other hand wander underneath her, to massage her magnificent breasts. We continued with this for several minutes, both enjoying it immensely, until a reminder of the big enema hit again.

I realized as she was heading pot-ward that it was time for me to pack up my toys and go, so I cleaned up and packed up. She came back out, and we both agreed that it’d been seriously good fun, and we ought to do it again sometime.