This fantasy is usually seen in men, who, despite radical changes in the profession over the last two decades, persist in imagining all nurses to be women. However, there’s a female variant of the fantasy, which involves caring for a man.
A sexual fascination with female nurses dates from the days of Florence Nightingale and the very start of the profession. These women, it was hinted, would answer more than just the medical needs of their patients. And, ever since the profession was founded, some nurses have sought and given sexual pleasures in the course of their job. In this they are probably a little different from any other group of people dealing with the opposite sex at work.
Nurse fantasies arise from several sources in the conscious and unconscious. First there is the very obvious caring behavior. When they go into hospital. people regress to childhood in many ways. The surroundings are strange and induce fear; the reason for being there produces yet more unease; and some of the time patients have to undergo painful or difficult procedures that make them feel even more like children. It’s a situation of dependence and vulnerability.
It should come as no surprise, then, to find that many people look up to female nurses as a type of mother figure. This is usually fine for most female patients. but for men it can produce emotions that are unconsciously linked to their own mother and her caring behavior, or lack of it, when they really were children. It can also reactivate old Oedipal cravings.
A combination of vulnerability, feeling like a child and having a woman perform often quite intimate rituals on him can all too easily confuse a man into reading things into the relationship that aren’t there. After all, many men are inept at interpreting man-woman relationships. Dealing with personal bodily functions also brings back memories from the unconscious - memories of other significant females doing the same things in the past.
Given that many men have unconscious confusions about such matters, as is evidenced throughout this book, it’s hardly surprising that sex and nursing go so frequently together in men’s fantasies. Many men tell me that their current partner doesn’t care for them very well or very much. By ‘care for’ in this context, they mean ‘minister to them lovingly’. The contrast in hospital when a female nurse, even though she is paid to do it, looks after their personal needs so effectively, can cause confusion and genuine lust, because it is lacking in their lives.
In certain situations, which will be part of the experience of some of the men who have such fantasies, a man will have spent quite some time with a nurse in a setting which, under other circumstances, would have led to intimacy and even sexual activity. For example, a man who, when ill, is in the company of a nurse for many hours a day, perhaps with her sitting by his bedside at night, when things are quiet, can easily find not only real caring at the professional level, but far more. In fact, a few nurses have told me how close they can become to certain patients (of both sexes) over a short period of intensive time together.
Another point is that when a man is in hospital his normal sexual life comes to an end. If he’s well enough he will be able to masturbate, but there are almost always unmet sexual needs in such situations. In fantasy he can have sex with the females who are there, and those he sees most of are the female nursing staff.
Some men’s fantasies of nursing situations verge on the passive. The female nurse is in charge, has to do something to him she would otherwise not do socially, and then finds while she does it that he is sexually exciting and irresistible. The desire many men have for sexual novelty means that nurse fantasies legitimize their raunchy thoughts in a way that isn’t usually permitted. After all, there are few other situations in life in which a man might legitimately be undressed or be so personally ministered to by a woman. Nurse fantasies cut straight through all these social barriers.
For the man who likes pain (and perhaps has masochistic fantasies), nursing procedures that create discomfort can provide just the right sort of balance of pain and eroticism. She has to do it because it’s her job, yet he can tolerate it because she’s so sexually attractive.
Yet for all this a nurse is supposed to be untouchable. She’s only doing her job. The man with such a fantasy wouldn’t have such overt sexual thoughts about a bus conductress or a woman selling lawn mowers. This very untouchability makes nurses all the more exciting as fantasy material. In the mind of the fantasist, nurses are allowed to do what they want to their male patients in the name of duty, but the man himself isn’t allowed to do anything. This is the very meat of good fantasy material, whatever the setting.
Some men tell me that sexy things really have occurred in their hospital experiences. understandably, such episodes are incorporated, alongside other details from real life, into the fantasy.
Alan’s story illustrates very well just how erotic a fantasy about a female nurse can be. It’s loosely based on a real experience he had when in hospital for a hernia repair in his teens.
My fantasy starts with my favorite nurse coming In to change my dressing a few days after the operation. She’s tall, has the most gorgeous hair and a beautiful figure. I’ve been eyeing her for some days and get a hard on just thinking about having sex with her.
On this particular day she comes into my private room. After closing the curtains to make the place completely private, she pulls down the bedclothes and says she wants to look at my wound to see If it’s healing well.
Slowly she opens my pyjamas and pulls them down to reveal my groin. The smell of her body, the way her hair glistens in the sunlight and the presence of her so close and yet so far makes me feel really horny.
She starts to inspect the wound and as she does so, I begin to stir. I pretend not to notice because I’m so embarrassed, but it’s all too obvious what’s happening.
As she finishes replacing the dressing, she ‘accidentally’ brushes her hand against my penis, stirring me into action even more.
“I think we’d better check that this still works all right after the operation,” she says, taking my penis into her hand and massaging it to produce an enormous erection.
“Seem perfectly OK to me,” she whispers as she sees the effect she’s having.
Then without more ado she bends down and slips it into her mouth. I’m flabbergasted, but delighted. She then fellates me as expertly as I imagine any woman could and within seconds I’m panting and ready to come. “Hold on,” she murmurs, after taking my red, throbbing prick out of her mouth, and goes over to the door and locks it.
Before I know what’s happening, she raises the skirt of her uniform and kneels on the bed astride my penis. I lift up the starched material to see that she’s wearing black stockings with lacy tops and nothing else. “The bitch,” I think, “ she came here ready to fuck me. I’ll show her.”
Being careful not to disturb my hernia wound, she lowers herself on to my prick and moans with pleasure as its swollen head stretches her cunt opening. I’m virtually immobile because I’m lying down and because frankly, I’m scared to death to do too much in case I burst my stitches.
“This should take the pressure off your groin and let the wound heal,” she whispers as she moves rhythmically up and down.
I reach under her starched white apron and fondle her breasts. She caresses herself.
Just at that moment someone knocks on the door. It’s the head nurse wanting to come in.
“We won’t be a moment,” my nurse calls out in a stifled voice and, within seconds, she shudders with her orgasm and I shoot into her wet pussy.
Without saying a word she gets off me, covers me up, straightens her uniform and leaves the room, pausing only to give me a backward glance and a satisfied smile that I shall remember for the rest of my life.
From : ‘The Joy of Sexual Fantasy’ by Dr. Andrew Stanway (1991)